The terms Yin and Yang (pronounced yong, as in ‘gong’) may sound familiar. Usually they are related to something in East Asian culture. Yin and Yang are often used to describe opposites like black and white, north and south, sun and moon, male and female…you get the idea.
However, Yin and Yang are not 100% opposites as each carries within itself a small portion of the other. Notice how the black swirl has a small circle of white in it and vice versa?
Possessing a bit of their counterpart makes these two forces interconnected and flexible. They are complementary rather than opposing. And are relative to each other depending on the surroundings.
We can take this example and apply it to our relationships. With people, the woman is typically Yin compared to her male partner, who is more Yang. But actually both are Yin and both are Yang. It is similar for same sex partners as it for heterosexual couples. It’s not about politics or anatomy, it’s all about energy.
Yin qualities are female energy, softness, being passive, heaviness, coolness, feeling, and surrender. Yang attributes are male energy, hardness, being assertive, buoyancy, heat, thinking, and attack. The yang partner offers yang energy in exchange for yin, and the yin partner receives yang and gives back yin energy.
Listening is one of the strongest Yin characteristics. When someone really listens to you, that person is being Yin because he or she is receiving and yielding to your words. There will be times in any relationship when this means that to be receptive (Yin) you put aside your own expectations and remain generous and loving to your partner’s needs.
Standing up for yourself and stating what you need in the relationship from your partner is a Yang action. This is an important part of your bond, but even this changes with time and circumstance.
The energetic interplay of Yin and Yang is a continuous ebb and flow. Each of us uses Yang energy for some tasks and Yin energy for others.
Keep this in mind next time your relationship hits a speed bump or your partner is driving you crazy. It might take awhile to find it, but underneath it all you share some common ground.