Have you taken time to reflect on your personal core values, as well as the values which you and your partner have in common? While there are many components to a happy, secure, and fulfilling relationship, one important aspect to consider is the shared values within your relationship. We all hold different values based upon our unique life experiences, and there are no “right” or “wrong” values. There are some values which are common to all healthy relationships, such as trust, respect, and safety. But in addition to those, what other values are important for you to have in your relationship? For example: connection, creativity, honesty, kindness, spirituality, romance, generosity, curiosity, mindfulness, reciprocity, and patience are all examples of values that you may desire to share with your partner. Sharing similar values with your partner will help to strengthen and cultivate a strong foundation for you as a couple.

After you have taken time to think about your shared values, practice taking it a step further by asking yourself how closely you are currently living by those values and what you can do to live more closely aligned with them. For example, if you and your partner both value adventure, what are some ways you can seek out new experiences together? Or maybe you value humor and would appreciate taking more time to be playful and laugh with your partner. If you both value fitness, perhaps you take exercise classes together or go for daily walks with each other. There are endless ways to practice living by your values, so don’t be afraid to get creative with this! You can also use your shared values in times of conflict to help remember the things that bring you and your partner closer together. Shared values can be thought of like a compass which you can use to gain a sense of direction for how you’d like to act on an ongoing basis within your relationship.

This blog post was written by Taryn O’Neil, LPC. To learn more about shared values in your relationship, reach out to one of our licensed counselors today here.